a tenant for my room. this was before I was going to tell him that I
would have liked to stay a few more months. Shit! I told him that I
felt really down this period and I lied terribly telling him that I
was down because I didn't treat him properly and bla bla bla. He
didn't seem to care about it and he told me just one thing that left
me a bit, how do you say, wondering... "Be careful, not everything is
as it seems. You must have heard other times. Beauty fades, inner
beauty can be stolen. Be careful what you do and with whom you do it.
HE is not as nice as he looks and he uses people as much as they have
a drop of blood left. He might be rich and charming but he is an
asshole". When I asked him who he was referring to, he told me that I
knew who he was thinking of. I frankly understood but I do not
understand how can he think that I would feel attracted by a man when
he knows I am a lesbian. last night I had a short conversation with
Anneka about this NY thing and she was very understanding about my
situation and my reasons why I cannot possibly go to NY. She said that
she will not force anything on me and that if I want I can stay in her
apartment while she is away, I can do so. I didn't even say thank
you... I felt like shit! She seemed not to care at all about my
jealousy and about me staying behind. I think she is after that
bastard. But if this is the case and I realise it I will let her pay
for it dearly. I will take the bastard to bed and try to do it before
she does. I am not stupid and I know that Mario, the son of a bitch,
is very much after me.
I fancy doing nothing today and I have to arrange to do something. I
start missing Napoli too much and I might go there to spend the rest
of the month.
Plus, shit!, I need to find another apartment because I will not go to
stay with Anneka. I decided.
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